The Economy
Every kid gets an allowance raise. Grown-ups can have one too if they eat their vegetables.
Inflation is when you blow up a balloon. I'm against it unless it's a party.A Letter to America
written by me (mom helped spell the long words)
Dear America,
Hi. My name is Samson and I want to be president.
I have been watching the grown-ups on TV and they keep interrupting each other and not using their inside voices. At my school that gets you a time-out. I think everybody in Washington needs a snack and a nap and then they will feel better.
I am good at cleaning up (sometimes), I say please and thank you, and I never ever take more than one cookie unless somebody says it's ok.
Please vote for me. I will be a good president. I pinky promise.
Love, Samson ♥
My Qualifications
a very serious resume
- My whole life of experience being a citizen of America.
- Can count to 100. Can count to a trillion if you skip some.
- Leader of the block tower. It only fell down three times, and I built it back every time.
- Has never once started a fight over who gets the window seat. (Ok, once.)
- Reads every page before signing my name on it. Mostly because I like looking at the pictures.
- Has excellent approval ratings from my grandma.
- Already lives in a house. It is not white but I could paint it.
My Platform
it's a platform because I stand on it to reach the sink
Mandatory Nap Time
Every day at 1 o'clock, Congress lies down for a nap. Cranky grown-ups make cranky laws.
Finally, a bill everyone can get behind... and lie down on.Foreign Policy
Be nice to the neighbors. Trade stickers, not insults. If someone is mean, tell a teacher.
My trade deal: two of my stickers for one shiny one. Very fair.Infrastructure
A pillow fort in every town. Better slides at every park. Sidewalks wide enough for chalk.
Roads and bridges? I already build bridges out of blocks every day.Health Care
Free band-aids for everyone, and they all have cartoons on them. A hug comes with every one.
My plan has no deductible. Only a kiss on the boo-boo.The Environment
Turn off the lights when you leave. Don't litter. Every family plants a tree and gives it a name.
I'm a huge fan of trees. They're very poplar.National Security
Nightly monster checks under every bed in America, and a nightlight for anybody who wants one.
I don't do classified documents. I do coloring documents.The National Debt
I will pay it back. I have $4.37 in my piggy bank and a tooth that is very loose.
Balancing the budget is easy. I can balance on one foot for ten seconds.Grown-Ups in Charge vs. Me
a fair and balanced chart I made with crayons
| Topic | The grown-ups | Me, Samson |
|---|---|---|
| Tantrums | Have them on the internet for everybody to see. | Only when I'm really tired. Then I take a nap and say sorry. |
| Name-calling | Every single day. | I got a time-out for that once. I learned my lesson. |
| Sharing | Still working on it. | I share my toys. Even the good truck. |
| Listening | Talk over each other on TV. | I raise my hand and wait my turn. |
| Saying "I was wrong" | Never heard it. | I say it all the time. I'm wrong a lot. I'm little. |
| Bedtime | Posting stuff at 3 in the morning. | In bed by 7:30. Fully rested for leading the free world. |
Endorsements
people (and others) who believe in me
Samson is the best leader I know. Also, Samson feeds me.Mr. Snuggles Teddy Bear, Chief of Staff
I've seen Samson clean a whole room in four minutes when there was ice cream on the line. That's leadership.Mom is required to say nice things
Such a good little leader! Do you want a cookie?Grandma has never voted against Samson
Woof.The neighbor's dog interpreted as a strong yes
My Cabinet
the cabinet is where we keep the snacks, so these are very important jobs
Chief of Staff
Mr. Snuggles. Never talks back. Great listener.
Secretary of Snacks
Grandma. Confirmed unanimously.
Secretary of Defense
My toy dinosaur. Very scary. Has tiny arms though.
Press Secretary
My cousin. The loudest person I know.
Treasury
Piggy Bank. Holding $4.37 in reserves.
Interior
Rubber Duck. Oversees all bath time policy.
Questions from Reporters
I answered all of them. Even the hard ones.
Doesn't the president have to be 35 years old?
I'm working on it every single day. Also I'm almost 35... inches tall.
Which party are you in?
The birthday party. Everybody is invited. There is cake.
What's your position on the filibuster?
I don't know what that is but it sounds like a sandwich. I'm for it.
Where do you stand on taxes?
I stand on the stool in the kitchen. Also, I think everybody should chip in, like when we pick up toys together.
How will you handle a crisis?
Take three deep breaths like my teacher says. Count to ten. Then ask for help. That works way better than yelling.
Will you hold press conferences?
Yes, at circle time. You have to sit criss-cross applesauce.
Pinky Promise Your Vote
No sign-up. No money. Just push the button and mean it with your whole heart.